What the Bible Says about Anger (Part 2)

by John Nieder

Anger is a common emotion elicited in response to dangerous, difficult or hurtful situations. When handled in a godly way anger is not wrong. But when anger becomes the catalyst for harmful attitudes and actions it is not only wrong, it is a dangerous sin against God and those around us. Last time, we looked at the consequences of unrestrained anger putting forth the following questions relating to your response:

In what ways are you experiencing the consequences of your anger? Where have you seen your anger instigating anger in another? What are some of the penalties that you have had to pay because of your anger? What other sins have you committed that were a product of your anger? Are you walking in spiritual darkness because of your anger?

Assume personal responsibility for your anger. When it comes to anger some people claim that they have no choice. “I can’t help it” is an all too familiar refrain. While the Bible makes it clear that we desperately need the help of the Holy Spirit, it also places the responsibility on us to rid ourselves of anger. While depending on the Holy Spirit we consciously decide to obey God and not respond in anger.

As you assume responsibility for your anger make sure to confess it as a sin and claim His forgiveness. Then allow the Holy Spirit to direct you as you consider seeking the forgiveness from those who have been hurt by your rage.

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Ephesians 4:31

But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Colossians 3:8

Refuse to respond in anger. There will be many situations where we naturally have that first flush of anger. The question is what do we do when this natural and real emotion surfaces? With the help of the Holy Spirit we can consciously control anger before it gains control of us.

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. Proverbs 29:11

A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but the slow to anger pacifies contention. Proverbs 15:18

Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city Proverbs 16:32

Learn to reflect and pray before responding. Do you react quickly to most situations? It is so easy for us to get our mouths in motion before our minds are in gear. One key to controlling anger is reflecting rather than simply reacting to dangerous and difficult situations.

The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil. Proverbs 15:28

My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment, do not let them out of your sight… Proverbs 3:21

Release your anger on a daily basis through forgiveness.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Ephesians 4:29-31

Ask the Holy Spirit to control you and your emotions.

Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Ephesians 5:18-20

HOW TO RESPOND TO AN ANGRY PERSON

Don’t provoke others by your words. Verbal dueling doesn’t build relationships. When you say things that hurt others they will typically do the same to you. So if you want to control your own temper, start by being careful about what you say.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

Avoid quarrels and disputes. If at all possible avoid situations where you might get in an altercation that invites you to anger. Don’t give anger the opportunity to strike. Learn the fine art of simply leaving before a quarrel or dispute arises.

Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out. Proverbs 17:14

Like one who seizes a dog by the ears is a passer-by who meddles in a quarrel not his own. Proverbs 26:17

But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Titus 3:9

Don’t associate with other quick tempered people. We become like those we associate with and those who become our friends. If you have a problem with anger the last thing you need is someone to teach you other ways to express your anger.

Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared. Proverbs 22:24-25